Harry doesn't have a surname, unlike all the the peers and their wives who you mentioned. Harry is no longer Harry Wales, he is the Duke of Sussex, which he was not when he was in the Army.
Oh, and Anne's record when it comes to the niceties of titles/names/etc are hardly exemplary. DO you remember how she signed her marriage certificate as Anne Mountbatten-Windsor which was not her name and which was widely interpreted at the time as giving her mother 'the finger'?
And yes, Anne used her married name in Court (that she was allowed to, when she is legally HRH The Princess Royal, says more about the obsequious court system than it does about Harry, whose behaviour, for the record, I also despise).
There is no reason at all for Harry not to be known as the Duke of Sussex. The Queen apparently has not demanded it of him and so I do not see that you are in position to do so. And, although there are some Peers and their wive who do not use their full titles commercially, many do. Finally, even we got Harry to be known as 'Harry Sussex' (or, more correctly, as 'Sussex') he would still be using his title.
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