I know all about kicking of ass, I started four years at offensive tackle for Damp Valley Community College, and probably would have gone to the CFL if I didn't tear my ACL in my last game in the Esperanto Bowl. My teammates were all hey, you should try wrestling, your last name is Hurtsvelle which kinda sounds like Hurtswell, like you hurt people well.
But I already had that figured out. I had since I was 9.
So now with one dream crushed, I'm moving on to the next, which is domination of [WRESTLING COMPANY]! Everybody from [ENHANCEMENT TALENT] to [CURRENT CHAMPION] better look out, because I've got my bags packed for [CITY OF INCORPORATION FOR WRESTLING COMPANY].
Who am I coming for first? Maybe it's [ONE HALF OF ESTABLISHED TAG TEAM WITH NO KNOWN SINGLES AMBITIONS]? Perhaps [MEDIOCRE TALENT EMPLOYED BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE THE BODIES ARE BURIED]? Could be [REFEREE WITH SUBSTANCE ABUSE ISSUES]. Or maybe Aiden O'Shea.
Oh, and I might try raping [ANY COMPANY EMPLOYEE]. Just to let you know, I'm skeevy like that.
Message Thread
« Back to index