Posted by smokeman Goldilocks went upto to the door and knocked, but there was no answer. But she tried the door anyway and to her surprise it opened, so she went in. On the table there were three bowls of porridge. One big, one not so big and one small (just like the large, regular and small at McDonalds). She was hungry and decided to try some. First she tried the big one, but it was too salty. Then she felt tired, so she went into the bedroom, where there were three beds, big, medium and small. She tried the big one, but it was too hard. She tried the medium one but it was too soft, but the little was just right, and soon she was sound asleep. She was awoken by the sound of very gruff voices. The big bear looked very cross and GROWLED, yes that loud. Then he said,"Little girly will have to punished." "Please don't hurt me." said Goldilocks, trying to look innocent, she was blonde and very good at this. The big bear, fell for her beautiful charms, and decided not to eat her, but what could he do? "OK! Well you'd better come for your punishment then!" said big bear as he picked up Goldilocks and tied her in a chair. Then he produced a whole carton of Marlboro Reds, "Well young lady you aren't leaving to finish these," he said, grinning. Goldilocks was taught to smoke by the medium-sized female bear. Goldilocks didn't like it at first, but decided she'd better get used to it, cos there were another 199 to go. The big bear was insistant the she couldn't stop at all until they were all gone. After she'd had 10, Goldilocks was feeling sick, and puked up the porridge she'd had earlier. But she still kept smoking. After she'd had 20, she was really starting to like it. The Mother Bear said, "Daddy bear, I think she's had enough now, shall we let her go?" "Do you want to go?" said Daddy bear to Goldilocks. "No," she said, "I like this now.", as she chained into the second pack. Goldilocks smoked all the way through to the end of the 200 cigarettes, without stopping. She became great friends with the 3 bears, and asked, "Can you tell me how to get home and where can I get some more of these cigarettes?" Daddy bear grinned, a wonderful new addict. He led her home via the cigarette store, and told the man at the store, to always give her as many cigarettes as she asked for, and that he would pay. Goldilocks became known as Smokilocks, and continues to chain smoke Marl Reds and is still as blonde and beautiful as ever, well actually more so. THE END, unless someone can think of a part two. Karen can sing the Teddy Bears Picnic song now, if she wants, lol.
on 7/13/2002, 7:54 pm
Once upon a time there was a beautiful blonde girl called Goldilocks. She liked to wander in the forest, picking berries and looking at the lovely wildlife.
One day she was having such a nice walk, and being blonde had forgottem her watch and sense of direction. Before too long it was getting dark and she was lost.
She was about sit down and cry, with no hope of finding her way home, when she saw a little house.
Next she tried the medium one, but it was too sweet. Then she tried the little one and found it was just right. Goldilocks was so hungry she ate it all.
"Who's been eating my porridge?", came floating in from the next room. Goldilocks had no time to hide, and suddenly three bears appeared, a big one, a medium one and a small one. The small one said, "Look someone's sleeping in my bed!"
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