Posted by Paul McCarthy
on 10/28/2009, 5:10 am, in reply to "Do you smoke in your home?"
75.189.212.92
Hello Lauren,
Yes, I do smoke inside at home.
However, it's also my impression that most smokers do not smoke inside, even at home, anymore. Of course, most smokers probably live with other people, and today... well, I suspect most smokers are too weary to even chance hearing the complaints that will inevitably follow if they smoked inside.
I live with my cat Caesar. Caesar doesn't seem to mind the smoke. He doesn't like it, however, when I turn on the fan after wards. I usually turn on both the ventilation system fan and also the overhead fan in the bedroom... now, I only have an overhead fan in the bedroom.
I've smoked (a conventional cigarette) a couple times lately. As I believe everyone here knows, my sexuality revolves around cigarette ads. My relation to the cigarettes and cigarette ads is intimate and changes over time, probably dependent on so many factors it'd be difficult to enumerate even most of them. Things have just been kinda 'hotter' lately in a fashion that makes me want to smoke.
Most people laugh,... but, I'm more afraid of smoking these days in that it'll more likely aggravate my fears of abandonment more than it might alleviate them. The pretty girls in the cigarette ads are pretty much... extinct, just like unicorns. For most people, who likely will understand analogies involving 'real' people better... it kinda just feels like I'm always chasing a girl who continues to walk away from me.
Again, most people laugh... but, good boys and girls don't smoke anymore. They used to when I was younger and the society was more friendly to cigarettes, and smoking, but nowadays those like myself need to be keenly focused on protection, i.e., emotional protection, in our society today where cigarettes, and smoking is not just some innocent kind of thing. Well,... as we're all aware, it's not really so okay anymore.
It's my impression that years ago, when cigarettes, and smoking, were so prevalent, commonplace, and accepted, someone like myself, who has a more intimate relation to cigarettes and cigarette ads, could just blend in... today, I think you've got to have a pretty thick skin to smoke, at least publicly.
Also, although I've even gotten a few gray hairs in the last couple years, my personality is still like a child in 'some' ways... and anything children and smoking doesn't mix well in our times. I mean... we can't 'play' with our cigarettes anymore, but I do, or want to. The conflicts here are probably obvious.
Where I currently work, I don't think smoking is much of an issue. But suppose I get a job in an office environment doing computer work. Suppose I started the job not smoking, and then, later on started smoking. Years ago, it wouldn't have been a problem, but it just seems today that 'everything' can be an issue.
I'll say it here, but even I an not foolish enough to say this publicly... but, I think like with homosexuality, I think it's more fear about the sexual overtones of homosexuality than AIDS that underlies many people's fears of homosexuality,... and perhaps making an environment were homosexuals might be more comfortable expressing themselves more freely.
With cigarettes, they say it's secondhand smoke, but I'm suggesting that it's more the sexual overtones of cigarettes, and smoking that is more at the core of anxieties concerning cigarettes, and smoking.
With either homosexuality, particularly male homosexuality, or smoking, one could (although perhaps it'd be in poor taste...) suggest that risks to public health would be diminished by suppressing BOTH expressions of homosexuality and smoking.
Yes, I am aware that if I suggested any such thoughts publicly today my arguments here would be completely torn apart and I'd look like an idiot. I'm almost certain I know exactly what they'd say too.
Anyway... this just highlights the ongoing agony I'm sure all of us here have to live with in our times... That is, being in love with something that our society, at least those who control our society, despise... or, at least 'act' like they despise.
Don't ask... I don't want to encourage anyone to ask... If you do, you're going to get a whole bunch of 'good' reasons... cancer, emphysema, etc. ... as to 'why' they act in a manner which I've characterized as indicating they 'despise' cigarettes, and smoking. You might even get some double talk about how they don't really 'despise' cigarettes, and smoking... but, the bottom line is, they are going to continue to do all they can to destroy something that we love.
So, again, the bottom line is... it's our problem, and we're all alone. Since that's the case, there's no reason to believe discussion with them will help.
Take care,
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